Pie in the Sky Hopes
by randigirl
Summary: A charity auction to pie FairyTail guildmembers and Lucy is on the Block! Its all for a good cause. What could go wrong? T for a little bit of Laxus Language. LaLu cuteness and pie!


I own nothing, but now I want pie. Enjoy!

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 _Why is no one bidding?!_

Lucy frantically looked around the crowd and almost all those gathered refused to meet her gaze. Everyone on the block had garnered at least three or four quick bids, even Mira and Levy. Most of Fairytail had volunteered for the auction to raise money for charities around Magnolia. It was a chance for citizens and fellow guildmates to dish out some sweet, sweet revenge, in the form of a pie to the face from the highest bidder.

Not surprisingly, her team had received some of the highest bids, retribution for all the havoc and property damage they had caused throughout the town. Gray 150,000 Jewels from the ice cream vendor, he lost his clothes way too much in there. Erza 250,000 from the bookstore owner (one would think after the third nosebleed she would stay away from the boys love manga). After Natsu stepped up, a bidding war ensued. It seemed that everyone in town wanted a piece of the rambunctious pinkette for one reason or another, with the All U Can Eat buffet manager tossing out 300,000 Jewels to slam a red chili pie all over Natsu's face and hair. Master Makarov himself received the highest bid from the Mayor, who gleefully smashed a blueberry pie into the diminutive Master's face for 700,000 Jewels. The younger Strauss siblings ganged up to get their demon sister. Gajeel Redfox surprised everyone by bidding high enough to pie Levy, then took two long licks of the cherry filling off her face. Her cheeks remained stained red the rest of the afternoon. But even the two sweetest members of her guild managed to make some money for charity, did no one really care enough to bid on her?

Lucy started to squirm. All ready to get dirty in old cutoff jean shorts, a ratty tank top, and her hair pulled in high pig tails away from her face, she had been looking forward to the fun. With her hands behind her back, she was absolutely mortified at the silence until she heard a muffled man's voice call out, "Can we bid not to?"

Lucy recognized it as one of the fisherman she regularly encountered in the canals by her apartment. The crowd chuckled and let loose a few "Here, Here's!" Relived and flattered, the pretty blonde mage smiled and decided on a bold gamble. "I tell you guys what. If you win my bid, not only do you get to smush this pie in my face, but I will thank you with a kiss. One smoocheroo. Its my own way of saying thanks and no hard feelings!"

There was a gasp from the crowd and the auctioneer started, "Well you heard right folks! Now can I get a bid to pie this lovely lady and be rewarded with a kiss?"

"10,000 Jewels," yelled the fisherman from before.

"20,000," cried Lucy's favorite baker. "30,000!" from the fruit merchant and several others at the same time. The bids increased in both amount and volume. "LUCY IS SOOOO COOOOOL! 250,000 Jewels!" Lucy recognized the Sorcerer Weekly columnist and giggled to herself. Jason wasn't so bad and it was all for a good cause. She blew the crowd a kiss and a sultry wink.

"500,000 Jewels," came was a weak voice just in front of the stage.

"OLD MAN YAJIMA?!" The entire gathering seemed to come to the realization at the same time. Lucy's jaw dropped and her eyes bugged out of her head. Yajima simply shook his head and muttered, "I can't take it with me." That seemed to snap her out of her daze and she laughed. "Anything for a good cause and a sweet man like you!"

The audience collectively "awwwed" and both Lucy and Old Man Yaji blushed. The announcer glanced around, "If there are no other bids…." everyone remained silent. "Then the winner is Mister…"

BOOM!

The announcer was cutoff by a peal of thunder so loud everyone ducked. Lucy heard a shriek but couldn't be sure if it was herself or the emcee cowering behind her. She checked the side of the makeshift auction block to find none other than the tall, blonde, Lightning Dragon Slayer himself. He looked entirely too proud of himself and the panic that his entrance had caused. "Laxus Dreyer! What were you thinking using your lightning so close to a crowd? Someone could have been hurt, I thought I had gone deaf!" The celestial mage unloaded on the entirely too smug slayer. He was such an ass! It didn't matter that he was a bazillion times stronger than her, he needed to think about what his thoughtlessness could have caused.

"Well, I heard that there was only one more chance to throw a pie in somebody's face, I had to get here in a hurry. What's the matter Blondie, did I steal your thunder?" Laxus was completely unrepentant and had the gall to call her Blondie? Lucy was seething on the inside until she realized he was too late. "Oh yeah Sparks for brains? Well you are just a minute late and a few thousand Jewels short. Mister Yajima won my bid with 500,000 Jewels so you can just bug off."

Lucy was extremely proud of herself. She really didn't have anything personally against the other blonde, but he was one of those guys that looked good and _knew_ it. It felt great to take him down a peg, in front of the whole town. She looked back over, expecting to see him taking a hike, only to see him standing there, his stupidly sexy smirk still in place. She opened her mouth to tell him off even more when he beat her to the punch. "Well, since this is for charity and all, and I just got back from a mission, what about 600,000 Jewels?"

The crowd gasped as a whole again until the little old man butted in. "I came here with 700,000 Jewels, and since the Mayor beat me to Maki, I can spend it on this pretty young thing!" Lucy sighed in relief at her ancient savior. There was a fire in his squinty eyes and she was flattered beyond belief. She turned back to Laxus and stuck her tongue out. There was nothing he could do now!

"You say you only have 700,000 Jewels old man?" Laxus seemed to ask disinterestedly as he scratched at the scar on his handsome face. Yajima slowly shook his head and let out a defeated huff as Lucy got the absolute worst feeling in the pit of her stomach. "I guess that's too bad, since I have 750,000 on me."

"Whaaaaaaaat?" Lucy was lost. Why on earth would Laxus of all people pay that kind of money? She absolutely could not fathom it. She was pulled from her thoughts when the announcer spoke, "If there are no other bids….? Great! Then Miss Lucy and her lemon meringue pie are won by Laxus of Fairytail with a winning bid of 750,000 Jewels. Laxus, congraulations and here is your prize!"

The tall dragon slayer sauntered over to the table with the last pie. Lemon pie with a good 3 inches of fluffy white meringue on top. This was going to be great. He couldn't get his gramps, but he could literally cream the goody two shoes of the guild. It would just be a bonus to see the sweet fluff run down her long neck and slip into those perky tits. He'd never been envious of a garment before, but that was one lucky tank top. Before his mind could get too far in the gutter, Laxus turned to Lucy, "Ya ready for this Blondie? I hope its as good for you as I know its going to be for me."

Before she could respond, his hand flung forward and smashed the pie into her face. And he didn't stop there. He rubbed it all around her cheeks and forehead and made sure that some dripped down into her cleavage. Her pretty face was covered in the sticky gooey stuff. He laughed aloud as she sputtered but surprisingly didn't wipe any of the mess away. She let loose a bark of laughter and grabbed the front of his shirt before he could turn away. He raised an eyebrow at the gesture, even though she probably couldn't see.

"Oh where are you going Mister Winning Bidder?" Lucy had him. She realized that he had teleported onto the stage only AFTER she told everyone about giving the winner a kiss. She could let it go, but she might never again get the opportunity to do this. "Whoever won my bid also gets a special prize. I hope this is as good for you as it is for me!"

With one quick motion, she pulled his face down to hers and planted her lips right smack on his. When he startled, she reached her other hand behind his head to pull him more fully to her and received the shock of her life. He started kissing her back! He swiped his tongue along her lemon covered lips and she couldn't help the giggle that bubbled up. "Oh, I don't think so Sparky." And with that, she wiped the rest of her face against his cheeks and chin. She pulled away and he effectively had more pie on him than she did at that point. The crowd erupted into laughter, whistles, and catcalls. Lucy gave a wave and blew a kiss and turned to leave. She was still laughing when she heard the low growl from Laxus.

"Oh, be a good sport. It was all in good fun, I promise!" Only then did she start to consider the repercussions of her actions. _Oh shit. He's gonna kill me. I am so dead. At least I can go happy!_ She thought as she faced her executioner and was surprised to see him right in her face. He paused then slowly licked around his lips and she about lost it. _He is so sexy. Happy death here I come!_ Then he ran one finger along her neck where some of the fluff remained. He brought the digit to his mouth and licked it clean with a moan. "I think I would like it better from the source. Why don't we finish this later and find out?"

The celestial mage did a wonderful impression of Pisces as she gaped after him, "Wha? Do you mean, me?" Her brain completely shut down when her gave her the sexiest smirk. Then he patted her on the head and turned away. "See ya soon Blondie."

That was the thing to snap her back to Earthland and bring forth the legendary Scary Lucy ire.

"YOU'RE BLONDE TOO JACKASS!" All she received in return was a wave as he walked off. Damn but he made that look good too.

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Sorry for any formatting errors. It all changed on me.

This is just a one shot to see if people still like my stuff. I got back into FairyTail recently. The ending of the GMG put me off. The way it ended just really didn't jive. And Tartaros was weird. But I've been reading a lot of great FairTail Fanfics and might could get back into it.

Please, let me know what you think, I really appreciate it!


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